No name

Madelynn looked at the mess she made. "If only." she shook her head. "Made?" she heard a voice, his voice. She shook her head and turbed away from him. "Madelynn whats wrong?" he asked her. She sighed. "Im gone." she took off to the woods. He called after her but she ignored him. Three months ago was her 16th birthday. It was sopposed to be the greatest night ever.

Four months earlier~~
"Madelynn what do you want for your birthday?" Ron asked me taking my hand. "Babe i dont want anything." i smiled. He laughed. "Come on please." he said making puppy dog eyes. I laughed and kissed his cheek. "I want. Um, a shark tooth necklace." i thought of the cheepest thing. "Now what else?" he asked. "Nope." i smiled. He chuckled. He wrapped his amrs around me and kissed me. I kissed him back. "Come on you two. Break it up." Vanessa came over smiling. "Hey girl." Ron said. "Yes?" i asked her. "Come on we got volleyball practice." she pulled me twords the gym. "Bye Ron." i smiled and waved. "Call you later love." he laughed and walked over to his friends. "You had to riun the moment." i said to Vanessa. "Of corse then what would i do to annoy you two." she laughed and we jogged to the gym. "Johnson, Howard your late." Coach Lynn said. "Sorry." we mumbled and went to go change.

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We walked out to the volleyball court. "So whats the plan for the big 16 party?" Vanessa asked me. "Um probably just gonna hide upstairs in my room the usual for my bithday." I said leaning agianst the wall. "Madelynn!" She said angerily. I sighed. "Vanessa I dont want a party or anything I just want to sit until dawn comes. The usual." I said. "No Made Im throwing you a party." She said and walked away before I could say no. I sighed and went over to grab a volley ball. I started practicing my serve. "You need to concentrate Johnson!" The coach yelled. I sighed. I just kept serving. I hated the coach but loved the sport. Once I did my two laps I went to change. "Watch out!" I heard and fell down. "Ouch." I said rubbing the back of my head. I saw a basketball bounce away. "Are you okay?" I heard someone. "Why the hell do you have a basketball in here. THis is volleyball practice?!" I snapped. "Sorry, we thought practice was over." he said. I sighed and got up. "Your nose is bleeding." He said. I shook my head and got up. "Ill be fine. Next time before you make a basket. Watch where your going!" I yelled and went to the bathroom to get a paper towel for my nose

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I leaned agianst the wall holding a paper towel to my nose. "Your sure your okay?" the giy asked. I sighed and looked up at him. "Yea." i said. He was goergous. He had shaggy black hair and bright gray eyes. They were more distracting then Rons. He sighed. "Look im sorry. I jumped trying to dunk but the ball flew out of my hands." he looked sick when he said it. "Dont worry its okay." i said. "You sure cause ill understand if you hat me:" he said leaning next to me agianst the wall. "yes im sure. Accident thats all." i said. He smiled. "im Nyk." he offered me a hand to shake. I smiled and shook it. "Madelynn." i said. He smiped but his face changed. "Madelynn. You should sit." he said. "No im fine." but then everything spun and i blacked Out when my head hit the floor. "Madelynn!" i heard

"Let me threw!" i heard Ron. "Shes waking up. Madelynn." i opened my eyes. "What?" i asked. I looked and there was a group of people around me. "Babe are you okay?" ron asked looking at me. I groaned and sat up. "yea im okay." i felt a hand on my back making sure i didnt fall back. "You forgot to take it didnt you?" vanessa said. "yea i did. Theres been a lot going on." i said. Vanessa ran and grabbed my water bottle and the bottle of medication i had to take. "thanks." i said taking it

Once I felt better I got up. I looked around. "Where Nyk go?" i asked. Ron looked at me. "Nyk?" He asked. "Oh the guy that had the basketball. He ran and got a teacher then left." Vanessa said. I nodded. "I feel bad passing out infront of him." I said. "Well maybe youll see him. Now lets get you home." Ron said taking my hand and dragging me out to his car. "You okay? You seem mad?" I said. He sighed. "Im kinda ticked yea. I waited for you like usual and you never showed and when I find out that some Nyk guy was hanging out with you and then you pass out. What am I soposed to think?" He said looking at me. I sighed. "Ron, Ive been your girl for 2 years. Why the hell would I cheat on you!" I yell

I word............AWESOME!!!!!!!!

Lol thanks its an okay story

I think it's very fast-paced, pulls me into the story. Just one thing, it's a little confusing because of the chunk of coversation lumped together. I would suggest that you split them up into separate paragraphs -- makes it easier to read.

i like the plot of the story nevertheless (:

Okay. Thanks

It's awesome

Thanks

I ended up walking away before he said anything. I was going to walk home. Half way there a car pulled along side. I sighed. Why does Ron have to win.
"WHat Ron?" I snapped. THe window rolled down.
"Sorry to disapoint but its not Ron." Nyk said laughing. I stopped and smiled.
"Whered you go?" I asked when he got out. He shrugged.
"Im not good around people when they pass out." He said. I nodded. "Understanble." I said. He leaned agianst the car. "DO you need a ride?" He asked. I shrugged. "If its okay." I said. HE opedned the passanger side door. "Hop in." I smiled and got in. Screw Ron, Im sick of his posseciveness

Cool

We drove down the street. We talked about school. "So where do ya live Madelynn?" Nyk asked looking at me. I looked around. "Um, Rettice Drive." I siad. He smiled. "Cool, me too." i smiled. "Maybe we can car pool." I said.

Chapter 2

He pulled up to my house. "Ill see you around." i said. He smiled. "Yea." he said. I got out a d slid my pack over my shoulder. I headed into my house. I tossed my pack onto the couch and turned on my stereo. I blasted the music and headed into the kitchen. I started loading the dishwasher when i felt something sharp slid across my neck. I froze. Not enough so the blade cut. But i didnt move. "Just do what I say and you wont get hurt." the raspy voice siad. I nodded. I looked down at the sink. I had my hand around a sharp knife hidden by the bubbly water. "You know Teraishy, you are quiet rare. I would get you for such a good price on the market." he kept saying. I was scared now. Even if i screamed the music was to loud to be heard. I just went with instics and quickly stabbed his hand. He yelled and Jumped back. I spun around. All I saw was a Person wearing all white. I couldnt see there face because of a mask. I looked at tye door and ran for it. But he grabbed my hair and pulled me back. I was screaming. "Now now Teriashy that wasnt nice." he said. I dug my nails into his hand. "My name is not Teriashy!" i yelled. Just then there was a loud chrash. The guy dropped me. I fell on my hands and knees. I was breathing hard. "Get away from her!" a loud musical amazing voice yelled.
I looked up. There stood a guy wearing black jeans and a red tank top. He was wearing a green motercycle helmet. I was breazing quickly. My azsma acting up. I couldnt evebn see his face when he took the helmet off. "To late warrioir, this Teriashys mine." the other guy said. I was hypervainating and passed out. Right before i heard the motercycle guy say. "Not if I or Prince Nycalisous have anything to do with it." then i was falling into darknes

Chapter 3

I woke up coughing. I was gasping. My throat burned. "Breathe." Someone said. I felt my inhailer close to my lips. I breathed in a couple puffs. I sighed and started catching my breath. I opened my eyes. The guy was standing there. He had to be at most 19. "Are you okay?" He asked. I nodded. I looked around. My house was trashed. "What the hell did you do?!" I Yelled/Rasped. He looked at the house. "Sorry." He said. I sat up. "I gotta clean this up before they get home!" I said getting up but almost falling

But the guy caught me. "Sit down until you feel well enough. Ill clean." He said and helped me to the couch. I sat down and he got to work. I watched as he cleaned up the mess in no time. He was tieing up the garbage bag when i saw his shoulder was bleeding. I got up and amlost walked normally over to him. "Sit." I said. He sat on a stool and watched as I got the first aid kit and a towel. "Are you okay now?" he asked. "Um well im confused as hell but other then that. Im okay." I said and started to clean the wound. He didnt flinch once.
"So why did that man keep calling me Teriashy?" I asked as I was seeing how deep the wound was. "I dont think I should say anything until Prince Nycolalous gets here." He said. I sighed. "Please. I need to know." i said. He stood up and looked down at me. "My name is Forge Eryclues. I am the Princes top warrior. He sent me watch over the Teriashy until he can get here himself." He said. I looked at him. "Okay. Forge, sit I need to put stiches on you." I said. he sat and I started to sticth him up. "What is a Teriashy?" I asked. He wasnt even fazed by the needle. Man this guy was brave.
"A Teriashy is a powerful person. It is rare to find one now a days. Especially a female Teriashy." he said. I nodded. "Doesnt help what it is." i said. I was finished and was standing infront of him. He was really hot. He had short black hair and sharp gray eyes. "Well miss, you are a straight blood line to a powerful race of people." He said. I sighed. "Names Madelynn. No miss stuff." I siad. Just then there was a car door closed and a knock on the door. Forge stood up. "babe open up. Im sorry!" Ron said. I sighed. "Go, its my boyfriend. Or ex boyfriend. Im still deciding." He nodded and walked out the back door. I went over and answered the door. "Hey." he said smiling holding a bunch of Tiger lilies. It was sweet but Tiger Lilies are my best friends favorite flower. I took them anyways.

I staired at him. "Yea?" i asked. He looked down. "Im sorry bout earlier. Can you forgive me?" he asked. I sighed. "Yea." I said. He looked up and grinned. he leaned in to kiss me but I just shoved the flowers into his chest. "But Im tired of it. And go gives these to Vanessa. Tiger lilies are her favorite." i said and closed the door. I sighed and walked into the kitchen. I jumped when I saw Forge. "What the hell you almost gave me a heart attack!" i said walking over to him. He looked kinda stressed. "Whats wrong?" I asked sitting infront of him. "We have to go." He said. I looked at him. I saw my things were packed by the back door. "But, this is my home. Why?" I asked standing up. He looked at me his face strained. "Because the school you love so much just got burn to the ground. They are coming after you Madelynn. They will do what ever is possible. Inailate everyone who gets in there way. Its not ssafe." He said. He grabbed my stuff and pulled me outside. There stood giant SUV. "But I thought you had a motercycle." I said stunned. "I did. I changed it. Lets go." He said putting my things in the car. he pulled into the car and put my seatbelt on. I sat there confused. He drove down the road. "Where we going?" i asked quietly. He relaxed his shoulders a little. "To prince Nikolious, its safe there." He said. He held out his hand. "Cell phone." He said. I gave it to him. He broke it and half and threw it out the window. "What the hell?! Thats my cellphone!!" I yelled. "Correction. That was your cellphone." He said looking at the road agian

Actually loving it!

Lol thanks. Still cant find a name