"Such A Painful Way" (her vampire reaper) - 6/24/10

You liar,
You freak!
Your apocalypse is real.
Death and hate,
And all your pain,
With more I must reveal.
About your psychotic dream of death.
Praying on the innocent,
And feeding on the living,
What a victim, what a dying way to live.
So many regrets.
So much more death you give.
Just sink your fangs,
Into my veins,
And feed, my love, feed.
Blood as black as cold ink flows.
I do not feel the pain, yet.
Give it.
Give it.
A bringer, to give.
Me a pointless philosophy.
I'm psychotic.
Yes, we know.
Yes, they know.
Because you told them!
What a freak,
What a waste.
Your apocalypse is real.
Bring it.
Bring it.
A dying victim from which they feed.
More death.
More life.
Every day.
More pain.
So much pain…
Don't you make me choose!
Don't you bring me more!
You wasted, giving keeper.
Something else,
Something more.
A life-giving reaper.
No name,
No voice.
Just savor my inky blood.
My vampire,
My love.
More is waiting, yet to come.
Give me take,
Love or hate,
And scream my name in pain.

i like it!

Really good (:

beautifully written.
erratic lines that bring across the idea of unbearable pain.
'give it/ give it' was a very strongly punctuated line, emotive as well, evokes emotions in the reader, just as much as you'd have put into writing the poem itself.
occasional rhymes in the poem makes the poem more lyrical and subtlety makes it easier to read. wickedly done to make the reader overlook. (took me twice to spot the rhymes lying around).

'you liar/ you freak!' was an awesome way to start the write. what 'liar', who 'freak'? gets the reader pondering and makes them want to read on. 'liar' and 'freak' are words with strong loading and negative connotation. it provokes the reader by taking the reader aback (like some sort of sudden attack). Hence, it engages the reader to read on.

Interesting read, thought-provoking and at the same time, humourous.

Creative, witty, and swift.

Nicely written!