Living In New York Can Be a Breeze or Punishment...really....It Can Go Either Way

Riss yawned widley. Her pink lips made an O when she yawned. Geez, godess was she tired. All she wanted to do was take a nap. But her father, Matt, occupied the couch. They lived in a two-bedroom house in downtown Brooklyn. A tough neighborhood to grow up in. Of course, they were Greek immigrants. When Matt and Aryssa had arrived, Matt had taken up a surname. Matt. His real name was...well it's too difficult to spell. That wasn't quite relevant to what she was thinking about though. Riss quitely padded downstairs on her feet. She was wearing her flannel red and black PJs. Riss spent more time in PJs than she did regular clothes. That didn't both her in the least bit. She shrugged on a black hoodie and flipped up the hood. She slid outside into the cool night air. She shivered when the air touched her skin. But it soon settled over herl like a cool blanket. It caressed and kissed her skin like an old friend. Or a favorite pair of jeans. Suddenly, a light flickered on in her neighbor's window. She jumped back in the shadows. Her neighbors were Italians. It was sad how all the nationalities were crammed into one little neighborhood. But Riss liked the DiRosa's. They were nice and made the best canolies. Riss smiled as her best friend, Marco, slid out of the window and hit the ground with a dull thud. Marco, stood up and looked at Riss with his dark brown eyes. He blinked his super long lashes at her a couple times and she asked, "You got the money?" He looked at her and grinned, "Yeah." Even though it was only eight at night. It was the longest day of the year, or literally one of them, and the sun was just begining to set. "So...what are we gonna get again?" He asked. Riss just looked at him and smiled, "Our school jeans."
Marco shrugged and grinned at the same time. She had the money to get the cab as well. She just hoped nothing bad would happen to her father while she was gone. Marco was halfway down the alley when Riss hissed, "Wait!" She vaulted up and into the window. A good move but Marco had seen her practice it time and time again to just get it right. Riss dashed through her house light on her toes. First she checked the answering machine. One new message probably from last night. She deleted it without thinking. She also silenced the phone. She didn't need it ringing anytime soon. Aryssa tip-toed into the kitchen and grabbed two apples and stuffed them into her bag. She also stowed away into the living room to check her father. The whole process took...maybe about ten minutes. Her father was sound asleep. His once very handsome 28 year old face now looked many years older. Her father was a son of Hephaestus. Smart. Cunning. Also a mechanic. He worked hard for their living. Ever since they came to America when Riss was four. He had also had her when he was 15 making him screw up his life. Matt's eyes nearly fluttered when Aryssa kissed his cheek. She left a note out on the table saying she went to the market for some food. She glanced at the Christmas tree in the corner of the apartment and then remembered it was going to be a slim Christmas after all.
Riss and Marco were already in the Italian market. Riss had a basket and was looking for some bread. "Marc, I gotta get some bread. Gosh, be patient, paidi." Riss said smiling at fish selling vendor. Riss had no taste for fish. She'd never liked them. Too salty. Marco suddenly called, "Here! I found a loaf." Riss walked over to him and smiled at the bread, "That's a nice piece you got there." She examined it for any signs of damagement. No, it was in perfect condition. Alas, something felt off. Oh well. Riss put the bread in her basket and paid for it. She picked up a few more things and then they went into the clothing part of the market. That was the most expensive parts. But it also wasn't as busy as the agora-the market. Riss and Marco were huntin' for jeans. Riss always had a terrible time hunting for jeans. Being a girl and all.
"Riss, c'mere!" He whispered in an urgent voice. Riss sighed and folded the jeans that she was currently looking at, and put them down on the table. "What is it?" She asked. Marco looked exuberant. He pulled an iron, rusted over dagger from underneath the table. Riss's eyes went wide and she whipped her head back and forth to check if anyone was watching. Nobody was. So she tackled Marco into an alley.
"Are you nuts!?" She hissed on top of him. He grumbled and tried to get up, but Riss was strong.
"What'd you do that for?"
"Don't you remember what happened last time when the peddlers and salesman saw someone with a knife?!"
Marco grimaced. His expression was that of an injured puppy.

Hope y'all like it. It kinda has nothin' to do with HON. But...the knife is important. xD

Is this your first write?

Yesh. <333

oh, because if it isn't i would be criticizing. but well.. it isn't that good, but considering it's a first write, it's not that bad.

Keep writing alright. btw, don't wait for reviews/comments. just keep writing, because no matter how others review/comment/critic, it's only you who know your write the best. no one can feel the way you do (even though if it runs on the same line).

I'll give you some reviews if you don't mind it being a little harsh. (and i look forward to your reviews on my story too (: )

MMk. I'm actually fresh out of inspriation. I NEED TO TALK TO DAN. xD Thanks. I suppose.

I liked the opening, it was grabbing. The story flows quite well, but it sounds like you're just telling the reader what is happening. Not really evoking emotions. It would be good if you could describe how the actions were done, how they spoke, and the setting. Maybe that would make your story more 3D? just suggesting.

and i think you are trying to stick with one POV, but you messed it up a little and ended up jumping around with POVs.

(POV = point of view)

I know what POV means, dear. Well I was bored with that story anyway. xD I'm currently working on a new one anyhow.

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