Beautiful Lie

Since when have we lost
The wonderful things that we need somewhere?
I fear the connection to [your] heart
& I buried myself with my body
During those days [when] I [lied] everyday about my fear,
You were already in my heart.

Cherish by Ai Otsuka (english translation)

PART I: Questioning

Damien Speare never knew his mother. His father, Nicholas, told him she died 2 days after he was born. He never saw pictures. He only knew her name, which was Selena, and how she was like from her father's side. He wished he knew her. But, he never asked how they met. The thought of it ate his insides and made his stomach churn in wonder. One night, Damien when to the basement to his father's personal library which he wasn't allowed in when his father was away. Gently, he knocks on the door 3 times .. Knock, Knock, Knock .. and waited for his father's response.

"Come in"

It was his father's voice. He opened the door which made a creaking noise as it moved. His father was found sitting in his chair with an old book in hand and glasses placed on his face that had no frame.

"Hello Father" Damien spoke.

"What is wrong, Day?" Nicholas gently told his only son.

For some reason, Nicholas always knew if Damien was depressed or had something on his mind. It's like as if he could read his mind. Damien always wondered how that worked.

"nothing really, Father ..." Damien licked his dry lips.

He sat across from his father and looked at his father. Nicholas closed his book, placing a bookmark inside when he did so, and placed it on the desk in the middle of the room with his eyes on his son. He didn't know what was on his mind, so he had to ask.

"no, really ..." his father insisted.

Damien looked at his father, eyes gazing up upon him. He never really spoke to his father so much. Nicholas was always away from him. It was either Nicholas was working or that he just wasn't around. It didn't really bother Damien that much since he didn't have any friends at school either. 'I have to say it ...', Damien thought to himself.

Damien cleared his throat. "Father ... how did you meet Mum?"

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Laying my head on my needle-like worries
I pretend to sleep though I can’t
Because of the thoughts about you that are more life-like than dreams
In the end, I stay up all night.

PART II: A Story ...

Nicholas sat next to his child as though he was just a little baby as he was before. Damien paid close attention to his father.

"Well, my child, here it is ...," Nicholas started.
"It was a dark night and I just got out of a few extra hours at work. By the time i left, it was practically Midnight. I walked across the meadows of a park, a shortcut I always took. But, that night was different. I saw a woman in the fields. She stood next to a tree adn the moonlight gleaming down on her made her dark hair seem blue. I thought she was lost so I walked up to her. I never seen her before in my life.
--'Miss, are you alright?'
She looked at me, her sapphire blue eyes seemed to smile at me.
--'I'm perfectly fine ...', she gently answered.
--'Why are you here, if i may ask?'
She looked up the the moon and smiled.
--'I love the moonlight here. It makes me feel warm.', she closed her eyes.
I was lost in the way she looked as the moon gleamed down upon her. And I couldn't help but ask ...
--'What is your name?'
--'Selena ... Selena Trinidad'
--'Selena ... doesn't the name mean Moon?' I asked.
--'Indeed it does. I'm surprised a man like you would know such thing!', she teased me.
--'What is that supposed to mean?', I protested.
She laughed and I never thought I heard anything so lovely and so soothing. She made me smile myself!
--'What's YOUR name?' she insisted.
--'Nicholas Speare ...' I answered.
After a while, we sat down under the stars and spoke about practically everything. We didn't care what time it was. We were just ... together. It's as if time stopped... We chased each other in the meadows and eventually fell in love the same day. We made love..."

Damien smiled. He was speechless. He didn't know what to say. But, he actually said something anyways.

"Wow, Father! That's beautiful! Amazing!" Damien exclaimed.

He didn't know what else to say after that. So he bid each other goodnight. But, for some reason, Damien didn't feel right. Like if something was missing. Or if something wasn't told to him. So, he decided that when his father left for work, he'd go into the Library to see if there's something in there even though he's never allowed in. But, the question is, 'Why not'?