My Lousy Scribbles

Perceptional Sophistication

Duels of power,
covert and secrete.
Capsules of protection,
built and bolstered.

Fables of friendships,
bristle and prick.
Tables of chimeras,
shatter and pop.

Dimples of history,
shallow and tarnished.
Candles of alliance,
dissolves and melt.

Girdles of living,
cumbersome and woeful.
Barrels of loneliness,
tumble and crush.
~Ger.

He Came

Sitting and waiting at a bench,
praying he is still coming.
She skips and paces around the car,
just to keep her hopes alive.

Changing and darkening sky,
despair is slowly eating into her,
She flips and glances at the phone,
wishing he would give her a call.

Hurrying and jogging over to her,
the one she had been waiting for,
She smiles and waves back at him,
his grin has lit up her raining heart.

Jumping and rushing towards him,
tears of relief pours out of her,
she flings and wraps her arms round,
squeezing the daylights out of him.
~Ger.

Going Solo

Bitter pills only swallowed,
silent resentments just held back,
none will see what's covered.
Beneath this masquerade of plastered smiles,
I am but a tempered, tattered doll.

Utilized by the faces known as friends,
having marks leeched from clenched fists,
frustrations are exceeding limits.
Under this layer of insane exterior,
I am but an alone, afraid soul.

Angsty that penetrates beings,
lost in a abyss of clashing emotions,
fury that can only burst veins under this skin.
Behind this expressionless mask,
I am but a haywired, erratic living.

Invitations to a black parade,
faces of perplexed expressions,
just another piece to add to their trash.
Outside this intricate mind,
I am but a forgotten, behind the scenes helper.
~Ger.

Burning Life of a Motionless Doll

The gentle smile sewn unto this face,
beauty in only the limit of its length.
A sparkle from the glittering eye,
genuine despair hidden by it's barren gleam.
The braided plaits of silk straight strings,
dullness to come with time and space.
A constant whirling network of thoughts,
fostered by a dead heart and silent mind.
~Ger.

Debris

Her arms once warmly wrapped around,
now her pretty face only dons on scorn.
Watched her twirl, but with other men,
the smile once his, no longer now.

Maybe she was waiting for today,
to show how he was yards from her.
Staggered to a corner, destroyed by sorrow,
fall into a vault of despair, devoured by despair.
~Ger.

Erik's Heartache

Promised you'll always love me,
Said I'm the only one you see,
but your love's only that of a pea.

You tore me into shreds,
left me hanging by a thread,
ignoring the tears I've shed.

My soul that's all worn,
my heart that's all torn,
Stuck in this life I mourn.

You'll never see my tears
You'll never know my fears
I'm counting down the years.
~Ger.

I'm But Weak

All of the things, not one went my way,
I'm doomed for life.
Joy seems far, happiness kept at bay,
this pain is sharp as knife.

It's dark, I'm in pain,
I've only myself to share woes with.
I've tried, I've struggled,
the light seem to far away.

Self-encouraging, self-entertaining, self-motivating,
those were just acts of a foolish girl trying stay sane.
But all these agony, but all those grief,
they are just too real to be myths.


I fear to close my eyes, I fear to die,
tomorrow seems so cloudy, tomorrow seems so grey.
'I'm healthy, I'm fine', that's just another lie,
just let me go, just let me leave, I've lost the last ray.

For I'm only trouble, for I'll only disgrace,
if I were to follow,
so despise me, so hate me,
that way, I won't feel as bad.

Don't look back, don't bother,
even if you know I'm depressed,
Leave me behind, forget I ever existed,
at least I won't be a burden to you.

~Ger.