My Lousy Scribbles

thnx its just a bunch a drama a guy caused....i hate guy they lie to much

totally right Amber they lie too much but i'm with Ger!cheer up a little!

Im trying so hard to but idk y i cant but role playing lets me becom someone els

i'm here if you need anything.
Ger any new poem?lool

ik and yea we want new ones !!!!!!!!!

The Star

Tugged on the bows and strings
of my heart and soul,
every word, line, verse and song.
You make me smile and proud,
to be idolizing and fanatizing,
you are everything that I
dream, aspire, and hope to become.

I adore but abhor you,
for I appreciate and feel
for each word you sing,
rupturing my pride when
the music finally ends,
and I'm left with the empty
vacant vault I am,
without skill or talent --
just a nobody in the crowd.


You clear but haze my mind,
as I yearn but realize I can't reach
the place where you are.
I wonder what I can be,
ponder where I can go,
because there's nothing I can do,
with the many flaws
and lack of abilities.
~Ger.

A/N: Yes, obviously I'm depressed and jealous. I mean, he's so freaking talented, not just in singing, he can sing, dance, play the piano, guitar, guzheng (chinese instrument), can act, and was a director before (not sure if he is going to continue persuing it). He knows so much and he has created a whole new music world. He is the inventor of the 21st century music. More a legend than any i've seen. he is only 34/35 this year, not very sure. I wish he can stay on in the musical world and encourage me to work towards being like him. but he said he'll be pulling out when he's 35 or so. so means he's pulling out of the entertainment industry. It somewhat reminds me of michael jackson.
I am depressed because i don't seem to be able to be even half as good. and i have this feeling that i won't be able to do anything because he's so outstanding and it will probably take me forever to get to where he is. /sigh/

alright, but i guess my friend gave me an analogy:
what I'm doing now is catching fishes with a net and then picking the fish i want for a meal. When most people are fishing with a rod to get the fish they want. That's why it seems more far off for me and it seems like a distant dream for me to reach. ><

Hope this is a good enough update :X

working on another at the moment.

I like it

thanks a lot (: have you updated yourself?

not resently bc no ones been reading them

we're in the same boat ahha.
you can see how active i am on here through the number of posts i have. lol. i'm like 3 years older than you on this site and i've only got about a hundred posts more than you.

lol yea

waw i like it Ger.but jealosy doesn't suit you!!<3

ik rite

how does it not? o.o
I get jealous of people who are good and aspire to be better than them. what a dream, much?

its i never thought u were the jelous type bc ur soo nice and smart .....

its not a dream Ger you can be better than anyone and here's a quote i like i think it might heplp you :"when you want something,all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it" Paulo coelho.when you want something dearly you will be able to achieve it

Yepp and i play trombon so ik what she is saying you have to work at it to be as good as you want nd be your self dont want to be like anyone els

that's exactly what i'm talking about!

i may be young but ik what im talking about

It's true both of you have quite a deep thought at that, but IMO, aspiring to be someone else when you're a nobody is more realistic than try to aim for a future you can't see. be yourself, but the 'self' you're being is as a result of the society and your family's influence on you. You're not exactly yourself so to speak. You are always evolving how can you ever be yourself? you evolve because others influence and see your flaws.

What is trombon? lol. I've never heard of that in my life.

I do agree that sometimes we just have to be ourselves, and being ourselves is the best part of being alive, but if you're forever yourself, you'll never know what it is like to be in other's shoes. Because you neglect others due to focusing on being yourself.

True, that's what everyone says, if you want something dearly, and you try to achieve it with all of your heart, you will get it one day. but i'm a desperate person. impatient basically. so I tend to feel depressed over what others can get in a few years that i cannot get. Like mastering and instrument for example. I'm starting to do better at the instrument i am playing now, but i'm still really far from being able to perform it on stage. It is difficult to perform a piano piece... and even more difficult to perform a song on the piano AND singing the lyrics. You have to split your mind three ways. one to look at your score, the other to recall the lyrics and one to pay attention to the sound to ensure it doesn't go off (the melody). I mess up when i start singing the lyrics when playing.

But i do like the quote though. It encourages but well... well... it sounds a little egoistical to me ><

you dont focus you just do what you do and WANT to be like other key word because i know that people try to be like others to test them selves but when it comes to accual life be yourself even if it means being isolated because you try to act like everyone els your whole life and you never fide out who you are because your every one els ........just words of advise

i get where you're coming from. but i don't seem to have anything i'm driving towards. i feel like a small fish in Pacific Ocean. Don't know when i can grow up to be a predator... or maybe i'll just become someone's meal.

but i guess at least i have something to work towards. like a realistic (not very, but at least if i work them one at a time, it can become reality) dream, rather than a specific goal.

yeppp

Rather Nightmares

Darkness beheld the skies as
night sat I down upon
mellows that soft refreshning
dreams caressed.
every night, a different
visage, queer but sound.

Yet, anguish bulldozes peace,
wrecking waves and crashing sails!
I dip beneath the surface.
Breaths of salt, all natural,
take I in, as fear dragged I down,
into the torrential black depth.

Sirens! I was wakened.
Sweat. Tears. Body, all shakened!
Devil it was, terror I felt!
None quite menacing yet. till I woke.
~Ger.

A/N: This is a more abstract piece of writing.
Adapted styles -- charlote bronte (specific write: regret); Shakespeare (feel)

I thought it was he is a great drama writer.