My Lousy Scribbles

Subject: Re: My Lousy Scribbles Wed Oct 27, 2010 10:04 am

Eclipse

Inch by inch, bit by bit,
darkness overwhemed where it was lit.
Piece by piece, part by part,
Sorrow feasting on a joyful heart.
Drip by drip, spot by spot,
emotions drained that all forgot.
Blink by blink, tick by tick,
life burnt away as fire licked.
~Ger.

Subject: Re: My Lousy Scribbles Fri Oct 29, 2010 9:36 am

waaaaw!!! awesome!! ur poems are really great keep it up and i wish u luck!!

Subject: Re: My Lousy Scribbles Fri Oct 29, 2010 10:13 am

I've been really emo lately... Idk, I just feel very lonely... No matter how much I talk to others. In fact, I feel happier when writing my novel then talking to them... Every time I start a conversation with my friends, oh well... that's the problem... I'm always the one who starts it... It's just me I bet... If I wasn't around, I bet they would be happier...

The following three poems should give some idea of how I'm feeling. By the way, all my poems are likewise, they all talk about my life, except those on romance (I'm clueless about romance. Ik I suck as a teenager, but I won't be getting into any relationship until I've graduated from University or at least from high school..).

]I'm imperfect, but I'll keep trying... Keep trying to be someone everyone likes. I don't want to be alone /cries/ It sucks a lot to be... Being alone makes feel dark, emo, angst, despair, lost, fearful, afraid... I know I'm not good, but I'm trying really! I'm trying! I just don't want to be alone... I don't want to be alone... It's hard to make friends, and harder to to lose them. I don't want to be alone. I don't want to be alone, I don't want to be alone... I don't want to be alone... ]

There, here are the poems:

Sympathetic Helpless Onlooker

Always the one to start,
a conversation or a talk.
Only the one to begin,
closen gaps that grow wider.
Who would see,
that he needs someone who cares,
just as much as he has shown?
Why is the world,
so cruel and mean,
to leave a man in need,
with nothing but grievance and agony?
~Ger.

[Yeah me, always the one starting the conversation... But because I want to take on a third person perspective of my life... And I'd very much love to think that my friends would like to help, just that they don't know how to... Would like to think they care, would like to think that at least they pity me. I don't care, even if it's sympathy... At least I know someone notices me..]

Desperate to Barren Eyes

Having no one becomes a norm,
as days of friendship wears away,
and people take on different ways.

New cliques form as old groups die,
as everyone thinks it's just okay,
yet they just keep truth by the bay.

Even a picture become acquiantance,
maybe it's just the course life takes on,
finding closeness but getting them sawn.

Every pathway has its bends and turns,
comrades closeness are often torn,
for personal achievements are why they're born.

Parties and gatherings end with partings,
they cry, they tear and they hug each other,
but none were true for they were never near.

Those who were loyal friends till the end,
became the pitiful victims left at the rear,
living in eternal perpetual fear.

None will never come by with a smile,
hand them a cup of water or a candy stick,
and guide them from darkness that just licks.

Never will any pass by even with condolence,
only glances of spite and disgusts flicks,
as the count down timer starts to tick.
~Ger.

[I don't know. this was the first poem I wrote of the three... Probably an general idea, a rough outline of the personal feelings.]

Torn

Strays,
at least people will pity.
Kittens,
as least kids would find them cute.
Puppies,
as least children woudl stop to tease.
But I,
passers only glance with contempt.
But me,
who would even show some sympathy?
~Ger.

[Last of the three written. But it's really like people will pity strays, people will find living things cute... But I feel like i'm just casted aside, shoved aside, into a hole, into a vault, where I'm with a pile of bones... And soon to be one of the many rotting bones...]

Subject: Re: My Lousy Scribbles Fri Oct 29, 2010 11:13 am

Oh, thanks a lot (:

Bless be too!

Subject: Re: My Lousy Scribbles Tue Nov 02, 2010 11:12 am

[Aloneness is completed with this thread as it seems...]

Subject: Re: My Lousy Scribbles Sat Nov 06, 2010 4:14 am

Presumed As Weak

Even if i were to speak,
my emotions will never leak,
for safety is what i pick,
and peace is all i seek.
~Ger.

Strangers Will Never Empathize

Pity reflecting off their eyes,
as they crowd round to sympathize,
thinking they are helping,
just by gathering more around,
they don't know the fear,
that eats the lonely soul,
as they stand about and gaze...
Bystanders will never know.

Despise that radiates off their being,
as they pass with quickening steps,
presuming they never saw it,
but turning back to stare after they've past,
they don't know the pride,
which they've trampled on,
when they whisper amongst themselves...
Passersby will never understand.

Fear of dirtying themselves shows through them,
as they drop pieces of tissue and some coins,
believing it is aiding the lonely one in need,
not knowing how much it detriments it,
they don't know the silent resentment,
that they've engraved in the mind and heart,
as the circle widens from the middle out...
Onlookers will never use their heart.

For they are but strangers,
with eyes on no one but themselves.

~Ger.

Subject: Re: My Lousy Scribbles Mon Nov 08, 2010 9:08 am

Others Don't Matter

Checking back every now and then,
hoping for a new praise to appear,
yet not even flames are thrown,
as death's bitter coldness settles in.

Despair overrides as days become weeks,
until the day a light suddenly shines,
and a critic falls from between heaven's hands,
unto this cutting silence forgotten by all.

That bundle of rekindled fire burns on bright,
for a week, a month, and onto a year,
yet after that one mistake God has made,
none more came and dark clouds began to cloud.

Master of all Gods has passed his command,
to change flame to smoke and smoke to naught,
and let the last bit of hope perish with the wind,
as rain slowly fell and dissolved the blazing fire.

But even in the detrimental point of life,
refusing to bend to what life thrusts it,
the core still holds on to unwavering faith,
and finds way to keep its tiny glow.

Laws and rules are made to be challenged,
and so Spirit of the skies gave a little twist,
to the miserable end of the pitiable existence,
with a bolt of lightning from the rumbling haven.

So even when it's dark and it's cold,
the pouring wetness the world gives,
will never wash away determination,
for it's forever fight on to stay alive...

For even when it's the only one sensing,
what's behind all the many words,
and tearing for the pain between the lines,
it is still the most authentic reader of its own writes.
~Ger

Subject: Re: My Lousy Scribbles Mon Nov 08, 2010 11:04 am

There're So Many Ways to Lie

People say it's easy loose what you love,
but to me, there's so much more to adore,
when the person you're looking at is yourself.

People say it's a must to know the world,
but to me, there's endless to find out,
and it would take our lives just to listen.

People say real friends takes a lot of effort to find,
yet to me, what is meant to come will come,
there's no need to hurt yourself over to search for it.

People say so much of working hard to reap what you sow,
yet to me, they are all just tales spun for little kids,
to drown them in make belief trust that spells insanity.
~Ger.

Subject: Re: My Lousy Scribbles Mon Nov 08, 2010 6:27 pm

i love it!!

Subject: Re: My Lousy Scribbles Tue Nov 09, 2010 2:35 am

Thanks (:

Subject: Re: My Lousy Scribbles Thu Dec 16, 2010 10:38 pm

I loved the "Others Don't Matter".

Are you doing all right, Ger? Remember I'm always only a PM away! Just tell meh if ya need ta talk about anything. xD

I liked the real world one. "even hollowness feels complete" I loved that line! I think I liked that one even better than the Others Don't Matter...Oh well. Good job as always!

(Guess what!?! MONDAY WAS MAH B-day! And this old Chinese woman gave me a fan...from CHINA! Very Happy

)

(Update Door WOMAN! Razz

...just a friendly reminder)

Subject: Re: My Lousy Scribbles Tue Dec 28, 2010 4:54 am

yoyo! happy birthday lady!

[update's here]

People Change
You told me once,
that rain was a gift,
the best blessing from God.

A grace from him,
we often neglect,
but left refreshing sesations.

So vivid to me,
the virtue of your smile,
as you sung your love for rain.

So clear that scene,
where you dance and twirled,
in the shower of droplets.

Yet in today's rain,
you walked, but with a shade,
pacing yourself to a place called home.

You said yourself,
that rain was your home,
a place you could not live without.

If it was an endow,
and you deared it so,
why did you try to hide from it this time?
~Ger.

Subject: Re: My Lousy Scribbles Wed Dec 29, 2010 2:05 pm

these are nice Smile

Subject: Re: My Lousy Scribbles Wed Dec 29, 2010 9:04 pm

thanks milly (:

Subject: Re: My Lousy Scribbles Fri Dec 31, 2010 5:18 am

Over-Idolizing

Admire or desire,
crush or love,
confusion or jealousy,
dream or reality?

Sometimes it's just all

Craving to meet you,
hoping to be near thee,
yet behind this screen,
I know I'm too far.

Or maybe I'm just too normal.

You are a star,
standing above the crowd,
whereas I'm just,
one of the many fans.

Standing in the sea of faces,
only hopping to be seen.

But it's all okay,
even if I can't get you today,
for years down the road,
I will stand above all.

And you'll be the one gapping,
as I touch the world of hearts.

I will not stay stationary,
and continue my journey,
forgetting you ever existed,
and working to be on top of the world.

I will not be worse off than you.
~Ger.

Subject: Re: My Lousy Scribbles Fri Dec 31, 2010 5:30 am

(Meet me in the chatbox on forumotion xD)
I think you put a lot of heart into this, Ger. I can really tell.

Subject: Re: My Lousy Scribbles Wed Jan 19, 2011 10:53 am

thanks ><

Nothing Left

He never expected,
a breakdown to come.
But just when she spoke,
everything were shredded --
his world fell apart.
~Ger.

Subject: Re: My Lousy Scribbles Wed Jan 19, 2011 10:55 am

Love You All the More

Apologies for all I've done,
those temperamental outbursts,
that you were never meant to take.

I'm sorry for all I've said,
the unexpected shrilling,
that you were innocently blamed for.

Forgive me for all my mistakes,
these slips of the moment,
that you were unjustly grievance.
~Ger

Subject: Re: My Lousy Scribbles Sun Jan 30, 2011 8:34 am

Fearful Fearless

Capture the sensation
of fear,
and let it captivate.

Imagine the scene
of qualm,
and let it control you.

Why can't I see
the picture
piece together in my mind?

Have I lost the
ability to feel
something so close to me?

Or have I been enlightened,
till there's nothing
left to falter and dread about?

But to ponder about the idea
of fear,
is by itself the greatest distress.
~Ger.

Subject: Re: My Lousy Scribbles Fri Feb 04, 2011 10:59 am

Far-away Mountains

I can never measure
this gap we hold
with even the longest tape
found on planet Earth.

I can never finish
this marathon
of closing the distance
between us two.

I can never penetrate
this sky high wall
of liquid nitrogen
that has risen.

I can never comprehend
the reason why
this constant drive in me
will never seath.

I can only persevere
in this race
and hope that one day
I can be beside you...

All over again.
~Ger.

Subject: Re: My Lousy Scribbles Sun Feb 06, 2011 12:48 pm

Desperation

Others do matter,
for they teach you
how to love.

Others do matter,
for they affect
how you feel.

Others do matter,
for they can change
how you think.

Others do matter,
for the world is round
and news travel.

Others do matter,
for 'I' lives with 'we'
and that's a fact.

Others do matter,
for we lifted their importance,
so others do matter.
~Ger.

Subject: Re: My Lousy Scribbles Fri Feb 18, 2011 2:08 pm

The Piano

Notes of many kinds,
making a beautiful piece.
Bars of different patterns,
creating melodious tunes.
Lines of various dynamics,
forming expressive emotions.
Sheets of diverse scores,
composes a perfect song.
Pieces of metal mixed with wood,
is the medium of these sounds.
~Ger.

Subject: Re: My Lousy Scribbles Fri Feb 18, 2011 2:24 pm

These are really good.

Subject: Re: My Lousy Scribbles Sat Feb 19, 2011 7:04 am

Thank you. I just feel that my thread seems to really have been forgotten. I've been waiting like since forever for a comment... D: Are my poems that bad.. that they don't even bother to read, or comment?

Subject: Re: My Lousy Scribbles Sat Feb 19, 2011 7:18 pm

I read them all and I really like them. I want you to write more. I really like them.